Patience My Little Pretty



Remember in “When Harry Met Sally” when Billy Crystal’s character finally steps up? He gives the famous speech that ends with “I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” I know that feeling. Impatience. The feeling of impending change for the good, a decision made well, a time for new beginnings and of having to wait for that change. Some things are out of my hands. (A lot of things are out of my hands. But that’s another blog post. Note to self: write a blog on control.) Harry took over a decade to come to that decision but when he knew, he went for it.

Not all decisions can be executed like that. There’s the making of a decision and then there’s the implementation. Some things take time. I don’t wait well. I want to move, change, do. A lot of the time that serves me well. My husband calls me a “thing-doer.” I know it sounds dorky but it’s really very sweet and came about, if I remember correctly, many years ago when we were planning a trip to Greece and Austria using frequent flier miles. I don’t remember specifics, what I do remember is that I scored round-trip Business Class seats during peak travel season. I’m not even sure how many miles we had to “pay” for the trip, but we got there in style. I could list countless things, discounts, rebates, tickets, refunds, extensions of contracts, exceptions to policies I have procured simply by doing the research, by being persistent, thorough and let’s not forget, kind to customer service people.

Persistence and attention to detail serve me well in many ways. What I have a hard time with, what I am working on now, is being able to sit with a decision well-made but not yet implemented. Some things just take time. Selling a house takes time, changing jobs takes time, writing a novel takes time. Deciding to do something and seeing said thing done are not always simultaneous. And sometimes the process can serve. Until you’re in it or on the other side of it, it’s hard to see how but I am going to sit back and just be. I am going to know that life does not always have to be a process of transition and change. It can sometimes be a period of being. Of just sitting with whatever is even if you know that in six months or a year, it won’t be. I am going to be where I am and do what I’m doing and be present. I know this lesson is here for me, and for me to teach my kids, that hurrying up life means you miss things. Whatever that may be, it’s all learning. I’m all for getting the hell out of a bad situation, pulling out all the stops and creating a shit-storm if need be. But, I’m also going to learn that if we are safe, if we are simply discovering and growing and moving toward new things, we can learn from where we are, and move forward with grace and with patience.


  1. heartwriter says:

    And the rewards from waiting, having faith, letting go…far exceed our wildest dreams.


  2. Debbie Sweetland says:

    My friend shared with me a quote that rings true: “We’re human-doings not human-beings.” I’ve recently taken on meditation as my way to slow down-and while I don’t make the time for it often enough, it is incredibly empowering because my perspective and awareness is changing for the better.


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